The Alphabet of Facebook Users

Here is a look at the different types of people which you may find on Facebook. Many people will fit into several of these, while some may be innocent enough to avoid such pigeonholing. Have a look and see which ones fit you:
 
A The Albums- These people are constantly uploading pictures to their albums, often arranged by year or season. Some share pictures of their lives, others share funny pictures and jokes from the depths of the internet.

B The Birthday Presence- This type of person is always quick to share birthday felicitations with each and every one of their friends. Sometimes they are so keen that they do it at midnight on the dot. You can always rely on them to know when it's a friend's birthday.
 
C The Chain Posters- These people insist on buying into the unfortunate series of chain posts which spread through the social networking system. Some fall prey hoping to find their 'crush's name,' others to spread awareness of some cause. More recently people have begun to parody these with quite humorous results!

D The Drinkers- Conspicuously absent from Facebook on the weekends, these chums break that golden rule- don't drink and FB. Ranging from strange drunken posts, to more rational yet deluded ones about how much/what they plan to drink, they somehow find it necessary to spread their irrational predilection.
  
E The Embarrassing- Often members of the above category as well, these people end up tagged in compromising and embarrassing photos. However, instead of un-tagging themselves to disassociate with the shame, they tend to make the photo their profile picture instead, thinking it is funny.

F The Frienders- You won't know these people but they will turn up in your friend requests. A quick glance at their profile reveals they have no friends or interests in common, and quickly enough you turn them down. They are often easy to spot my their strange sounding foreign names!

G The Gs- Jocks, cool kids, whatever name they are known by, these guys spread their uncaring, rebellious attitude over the Internet. Stories from parties, feats of braveness and stupidity, and much more appear in their statuses as if they are the height of coolness.

H The Holidayers- Combine a person on holiday with an Internet connection and you get these- sharing photos and stories, they generally do their best to make all their friends feel jealous, since they are lucky enough to be on holiday in some remote spot or famous city.

I The Imposters- These guys find it funny to change their names into something other than their actual name. Whether it's sticking someone else's name in the middle of theirs, or putting strange characters into theirs, it makes it very hard to work out who it actually is!

J The Jokers- Always keen for a laugh, these fellows are constantly sharing funny jokes and pictures. Sometimes these jokes are inside ones, so only a few know what they are going on about. Some have some many that they devote whole albums to demotivators or lolcats etc.

K The Kiss and Cuddlers- When two people are in love, even the Facebook community isn't spared the embarrassing smoochiness of their being together. They share cute little posts, sometime just with little hearts. How cutsie!

L The Likers- These people, to varying extents, decide that they have to personally like everything they see, enjoy, or have any sort of affinity with. Out of this developed the pages stating some human action common to many people which these guys 'like' and share with all their friends.

M The Mothers- These are some of the hardest to find on Facebook. Their pages are private and their profile picture consists of nothing but a picture of their children. Good luck trying to work out if they are the person you're looking for!

N The Newspapers- If anything happens in the world, these guys will have a link or post about it. Whether it be news, business or sport, you can rely on them to keep you up-to-date with everything around the globe.

O The Oldies- You know full well they're not Facebook people and are only there because someone has convinced them to make a page- but you add them anyway. They tend to come on every three or four months and accept a dozen friend requests, then disappear back to the real world.

P The Poets- Whether it's from a literary source or just a song, these people love to share phrases, lines or, heaven forbid, whole stanzas, which they find appealing. Sometimes they have underlying messages and implication, but most of the time they're just words which have a nice ring to them- at least in these people's minds.

Q The Quizzers- If there is a quiz doing the rounds, these people will have done it. Not only do they complete them, but they fill them out as many times as needed to get the result they want, then invite all their friends, and share it on their page. 

R The Requesters- These people seem not to understand that you can skip the request page on applications. Instead they choose the maximum number of friends possible and bombard them with requests for the most annoying things, usually with some strange pretext like giving coins.

S The Sleepless- Sometimes you wonder if these guys are ever off facebook. Regularly awake past 3am, they seem like a permanent feature in the online chat list. Every now and then they post something, but Lord knows what else they get up to at those hours...

T The Twits- Some people seem to mistake facebook for Twitter and their statuses become more like tweets than anything else. Couple this with an iPhone or the like, and they become mobile Facebookers. Eventually you'll be up-to-date with everything these guys are doing!

U The Unintelligible- For these people, spelling seems optional. Breaking as many rules as possible, dey try 2 rite lyk dis 4 az lng az dey kan. Reading their statuses is like trying to decipher several foreign languages- until your realise they are actually speaking English.

V The Victims- Whether they have left their computer unattended or their password has been hacked, these people get 'fraped.' Unsurprisingly, the same people tend to fall victim several times; from time to time incriminating statuses and pictures pop up, though it has become common enough that you aren't fooled.

W The Womanly- Guys who like to express their feminine side, whether showing photos of their baking or letting others know they are doing the ironing. They seem to be relatively unaware or indifferent to the appearance of this however!

X The Xylophones- These folks love their music and will stop at nothing to share it with others. Whatever genre- be it classical or heavy metal- they will always have a link to some new song they want you to listen to.

Y The Young-uns- They are getting younger and younger on Facebook. Now Primary school kids have their own Facebook pages. Let's hope they don't see half of the rubbish there is on the Internet!

Z The Zookeepers- These poor, twisted souls' lives have been subsumed by ridiculous games such Farmville. Not only do they waste their lives away on them but they try to recruit other unsuspecting victims to fulfil their absurd obsessions. 


Have a look at your Facebook and see which of your friends is one of these!